1. Replace the flooring with a trampoline.
Why senior slump when you could senior jump?
And according to the new class slogan, the Class of 2011 is Down to Flop.
Flopping around on a trampoline in between classes would be a great way to relieve stress, bond with peers, and curb childhood obesity.
What fun! Complications to this plan include plausibility, cost, and potential fatal injuries, but I think it is pretty apparent that the benefits outweigh these concerns.
The senior class is filled with raw talent that we must nurture, which is just one of the many reasons why we should implement a daily rotation of performances in the commons.
The musically inclined folks could provide beats for everyone to bounce to on the trampoline in unison, giving us the opportunity to live out the teenage dream as the cast of High School Musical Four, starring recently discovered theatrical star Sam Dorfman.
Next, stay tuned for the Comedic Stylings of Max Clary.
The last resort for entertainment is a showcase of ballroom dancers; however, we cannot rely on them to give a lengthy performance because, in case you have not noticed, they are often rushin’.
3. Freshen the air.
This suggestion is perhaps the most commonsensical’€or rather, commonscentsical’€of all.
If our class budget allows for clown noses on every table at Semi, I think we can afford to buy a few Glade plug-ins to make the commons more aromatic. In fact, with all the beans we will be consuming, investing in air fresheners is absotootly critical.
If all the previous plans are rejected, then the addition of a mere table would suffice.
Just because we have apparently outgrown the cafeteria does not mean we have outgrown the dependence on a table to have a comfortable dining experience.
Speaking of the cafeteria, I heard that the salad and sandwich bars have been scrapped, which I have been persuaded to believe is part of a plan to wipe out the vegetarian population.
Neglected and starved, the veggies are now forced to scrounge for food, some even resorting to handfuls of ketchup and mustard packets for nourishment.
We must stop this madness before they go extinct.
Otherwise, who will be there to remind us that we are lesser, soulless monsters when we eat meat?
I end by imploring you to join me in my quest to improve the commons.
According to Thomas Paine’s pamphlet Common Sense, “The Sun never shined on a cause of greater worth.
Though no blogger of this sort exists in the South community, the technology that students use on a daily basis to be in constant communication with peers can, in some cases, have a similar effect.
In the age of texting, instant messaging, Facebook, and Formspring, it only takes the click of a button to spread gossip, publicize opinions, start rumors, or generate drama.
“Gossip and drama are spread through technology because it’s faster and easier to do. I find that a lot of people will find it easier to say something on a text or on Facebook then they would in real life, junior Alex Seibel said.
Sophomore Isabelle Granahan-Field also recognizes this phenomenon and points out how problems can be caused unintentionally as well, since tone is lost in technology.
“Sometimes messages aren’t portrayed the way you mean them to be or they aren’t interpreted right, Granahan-Field said.
She also notices a new trend that has developed as a result of Facebook, explaining that “sometimes people do things and take pictures of it just to put it on Facebook.
“When people are taking pictures they sometimes are already considering who will see them, what the album title will be named, or what will be tagged, junior Yudit Bolotovsky said.
She added that this publicizing of photos has made Facebook “essentially like Gossip Girl.
Although texting is not a public exchange of information, it expedites the process of spreading gossip. “People usually text their friends the second they find out about something interesting, Bolotovsky said.
Texting can also cause drama when a text meant just for the intended receiver is shown to others, something that happens very often with instant messaging as well.
People often think that their conversations with people over texts and instant messages are completely private, overlooking the fact that whatever they are saying could be easily forwarded or copied and pasted to someone else.
This often results in increased circulation of gossip, damaged friendships, or hurt feelings.
A new site, Formspring, allows people to anonymously ask users questions about anything. Not surprisingly, this anonymity leads people to ask questions less along the lines of “what’s your favorite color? and more along the lines of “I hate you, why are you so annoying?
Technology of this sort, in eliminating the challenges or implications that come with saying something to someone’s face, lead people to feel entitled and confident to say whatever they please. Again, this can lead to drama and hurt feelings.
Despite all of these negative effects of communicating through technology, there are positive effects as well.
As cited in a recent article published in the New York Times, Elizabeth Hartley-Brewer, author of a book called Making Friends: A Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Child’s Friendships, believes that “the electronic media is helping kids be in touch much more and for longer.
Granahan-Field supports this belief, claiming, “Facebook and texting can make relationships stronger because it lets me stay in touch with people.
In spite of the unfavorable aspects she emphasized about Facebook, Bolotovsky also finds many positive components.
“It helps me communicate with people in my classes about homework, keeps me social, is good for organizing events, and helps me get my mind off things, she said. Simlarly, junior Rachel Davidson uses Facebook “to communicate with people for schoolwork that I may have no other way of contacting.
“I think Facebook helps some people branch out and brings people closer, and I think texting is helpful because it lets me get quick answers, Davidson said.
Regardless of the pros and cons of texting and Facebook and the like, communicating through technology has become such an integral part of daily life that it seems impossible to imagine how life would continue without it.
But don’t worry Upper East Siders, this form of communication is not likely to disappear or decrease in popularity any time soon.]]>