View from the Top: Nick Caggiano, Alec Sherman, and Max Vasiloff

By Denebola
Published: November 2009

DISCLAIMER: We cannot guarantee you will enjoy this as much as the last View from the Top, but we will do our best.

All too frequently, the View from the Top has been used to bash underclassmen and other unsuspecting groups who may have made some mistakes or just fallen victim to the mistakes of senior girls. But we don’t know you guys well enough/you guys aren’t even worth talking about, so y’all get a big “child, please.

Although the three of us have many different interests, we have three important things in common: ghosting, our drums, and, of course, The O.C¦bitches.

The act of ghosting is simple: shadow someone for as long as you can, and the person with the longest time wins. What’s not so simple is not getting caught. I bet some of you have seen us ghosting down the halls, or even outside at the front of the school.

Sure, some of you may think this is stupid, but it is a great way to have a good time, especially when you get a dirty look from one of our school’s wenches (bonus points).
Most girls think this is a third-grade way of flirting (calm your drums), but it is the complete opposite. We try to pick the most hilarious looking kids to go after, so if we pick you¦sorry? Not really, but it’s whasseva.

As it gets colder and colder, the more layers we boys have to put on. This is a great help because our drums are now hidden from the opposite sex. If you’re wondering what a drum is, just ask laxer Wil Mason, as he can shed some light on the subject. Sadly, some of us will get sloppy, and think that if nobody sees our drums, we don’t need to tone them up.

If you have that opinion, take that opinion and flip it 180 degrees. This is a rookie mistake. This is your time to shine. Hit the gym asmap (as soon/much as possible), and fsu. So by the time spring rolls around and we’re outfitted in our pinneys (maybe some of you lucky ladies will get the pinneyless view), we won’t have anything to hide.

Obviously, you want to keep a little drum, so we suggest going with a four pack. A six pack is a little much, and maintaining one takes way too much work, unless you’re name is Josh Cohen-Kaplan; in case you were wondering, all you ladies and jealous guys, his tonnage comes naturally.

To maintain a six pack with no drum means no partying (not that that would be a problem for all of our innocent athletes). All in all, be cautious about going to McDonald’s everyday (Justin Klumpp), because this is the perfect way to let the drum get out of control.

To define fsu in 80 degree weather, one must have a little drum. For those who are ignoring this advice, your life with the ladies is about to kiss the baby (it’s ova).

Next, we each adore The O.C. Some of you may think that this means, we¦ uhh¦don’t like girls? But, that’s not true. We just have total crushes on Summer, Marissa, and Alex, a.k.a. quista jivels (mush for hot girls). Not to mention that Max has a girlfriend¦! And let’s just say Alec and Nick know how to flaunt their drums.

If you can’t find some way to enjoy this show by watching it, just watch it to talk to girls. It’s fantabulous because it is so easy to use The O.C. as some type of starter conversation. Chicks dig it.

For those underclassmen boys who have seen intimidating girls like Nicole Melton walking down the hall, yell out “O.C., and I’m sure she will shoot a look your way. If that’s not a good enough reason to watch it, then we don’t know what is.

So we’re seniors this year¦big deal? Not really. So far senior year has been all we could have hoped for and more. As if it weren’t enough that none of us three are playing sports in the fall so as to give us more free time, some of us are even maintaining ties with our ex teammates. Those football players are so forgiving.

Anyways, we have had a long journey throughout high school.

We started our freshman year as girl haters and video game players. This lasted us a good while until we were forced to talk to girls during group projects and when we didn’t know the Latin homework.

That’s when we decided to turn the mojo on. Yeah¦that didn’t even really help ‘Ëœtil junior year, but that’s another story.

Lastly, we said we weren’t going to do this, but we would like to say one thing to each grade.
Freshman: Paul Vasiloff, Lauren Sherman, and Emily Caggiano are all single. Get @ them.

Sophomores: not much to say except are you the naughty nine, or has there been another addition? Not that we care, it would just be nice to let everyone know. By the way, how has all that karma been working for you lately?

Juniors: Jeff Hurray is the cutest person in your grade, hands down. But when it comes down to the ratings, he only gets an eight out of 10. Y’all should try and work on that. O, and your a$$ is gra$$ in the Powderpuff game.

Well, that’s all the time we have. We would just like to thank the lovely staff at Denebola for picking us for this issue; your choice couldn’t have been better.

And remember, our swagga’ so bright, we don’t even need light. This View from the Top has just kissed the baby.

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